Be careful crossing oceans for people who won't even jump puddles for you.
I'm the first one to say that doing things for other people without expecting anything in return is not only noble, but healthy. Using our kindness and empathy in such a way not only blesses others, but it truly makes us happy in return so everyone benefits from it. However, it is one thing when we are kind and courteous to complete strangers without expecting anything, but something completely different when we give, and give, and give to those we have relationships with, and never, or rarely, get anything in return.
In healthy relationships there should always be something called reciprocity. The dictionary defines reciprocity as, "The practice of exchanging things with others for mutual benefit". In a relationship, both parties should benefit. Whether it's a marital relationship, parent-child relationship, sibling relationship, work relationship, etc., it should always work both ways. Some may think it's selfish to ask for anything in return, however, not only is it not selfish, it's good and healthy to ask for, and receive, what we need. Never getting our needs met can cause physical and mental strain, among other things. As human beings we all have wants and needs and should be working to support each other to make sure everyone is taken care of... and that means all the care takers too!
So, with that in mind, now might be a good time to re-evaluate our relationships. Think about which relationships are reciprocated, and which ones might need some work. For those relationships that need some help it's okay to have a conversation with that person explaining how you feel and what needs to change in order for the relationship to continue. It may be that this person hadn't even realized there's a problem and is more than happy to make some changes. However, some may not think there's a problem, or may be unwilling to change. In these cases it's perfectly fine to end the relationship if possible, or create some strong boundaries so that you can protect your own mental health and well being. I'm finding that the more I cut ties with those who don't reciprocate, and look for those that do, the more I find who I'm looking for and the love and support goes both ways in the relationship. And, in the end, aren't these the types of people we want to spend our lives with. Life is too short to spend it with any other kind!
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